Today was a challenging day for me. I am not really sure why except I felt as if I wanted to isolate myself indoors, curl up somewhere and get lost in my own thoughts.
I tried several times to record the podcast and finally realized I just needed the quiet so I let it go. I am planning on doing the same for tomorrow so I can allow myself some space to breathe a bit.
It does have me thinking a bit however about the creative process but more importantly about creatives. Of course, I can only speak for myself but I find that that creativity for me isn’t just something I do but rather it’s something I feel, it’s a way of life. Creativity comes into every aspect of my life in the most basic of ways.
Tonight I was talking with my daughter who is almost 8 and explaining to her that Mommy feels her way into decisions and choices rather than needing a lot of information or facts. This feeling into life rather than orchestrating it always has me stumped when I try to make a living. Working in a more traditional way slowly numbs me to the point of misery (at least eventually) and making a living from my creativity seems so unbelievably hard.
How can you make a consistent income from inconsistent work?
How can you create something that is not forged in a traditional way and use it to support yourself traditionally?
I do believe I can benefit from my little containers and loose schedules. They remind me of what’s important when I can so easily become distracted by Netflix or YouTube. However, the consistency factor is where I stumble all the time. My first priority is to my well-being in all facets so if recording a podcast feels like I am kicking myself or is draining me of energy or light I won’t do it. I really believe we are meant to enjoy our lives and that if we choose the path of joy, feeling our way into each moment we won’t be lead astray.
I haven’t really figured out what type of business model that is.
I imagine it’s not one. It’s a concept I have really. This crazy belief that just because a lot of people are doing it and receiving “success” doesn’t mean that it’s my path. After all, success to me looks like happiness. It feels like enjoying my work. Creating a blog post that feels like perhaps I have hit upon something.
Sharing it with a few other creative souls who might also nod their heads and think, “I wonder..”
Together, we form this little creative collective.
And slowly things change. And newness arises.
Here’s to newness.
Until next time…
-Michele, aka The Dreaming Dilettante