Ah daylight savings time-you are no friend of mine.
While last week I was high on my new found earlybirdness this week is proving to be a bit more of a stress. Morning is so early now, and it’s still dark out and my bed so comfy and warm….regardless I will still treck on and relish that I am still getting up earlier than I was-even if just by a bit.
The beautiful part is I am still get done what I want to get done in a manner that is neither rushy-crazy, stressed-out discipline or lacking fun. I am still able to take time for the moments, relish a cup of tea or conversation with my mom. Enjoy a walk after dinner with my family, breathe slowly, humming a bit as I fold laundry and meeting the stresses that we face each day with a calm that reminds me I can handle this.
Do I get frazzled?
Yup
Do I get short-tempered and swear?
Often
Do I wonder why I can’t for ONCE get a break in this ONE area of my life?
True
Do I recover a lot faster than I used to?
Definitely!
So what’s the trick? What’s the magic answer?
Priorities.
I know what my priorities are. I know what my individual ones are and what my family priorities are-and I have worked to align the two.
It’s funny how when you know where you want to go how easily you can avoid the roads that don’t take you there.
Once I stopped trying to find something practical that I could then tear-down, dress-up and make look like what I really wanted; once I stopped waiting for the universe to hand me my perfect opportunity I realized what I wanted and more importantly that I already had everything I needed to accomplish it.
Once I stripped off the world’s view of what “accomplishment,” and “success” meant and instead redefined them for myself-suddenly the battles seemed easier.
Probably because I had gotten rid of my biggest antagonist.
Me.
The struggles in life are much less difficult when you aren’t fighting yourself.
So how did I become clear? For me, I always lie in bed at night thinking about what I want tomorrow to look like. It used to be that what I wanted was squeezed in between all these things I had to do, or should do or that others felt were important. Things I had committed to because someone else wanted it and I didn’t say know. So I started doing something different.
I took out all my obligations.
All of them. Even family ones.
I liken it to re-doing a room in your house-I took out every piece of furniture-even the couch that you knew was going back in-I took it out.
Then I looked at this empty space and said, “what do I want to bring back in.”
And I slowly started putting back in the things I wanted. Before anything went back in I looked at it, and thought, “Do I want this in here or am I just avoiding telling this person that I don’t want to do this anymore?” If the answer was, “yes” I decided to leave it out.
And WOW what a feeling of relief and empowerment!
And that’s how I knew it was right.
You know what wasn’t there?
Guilt.
That’s also how I knew it was right.
And slowly, the room took shape. It looked like I had imagined.
So now, it’s easy to tell whether or not something works for me-if it goes in the room or leads me to my destination it can be a yes. If it doesn’t, well, it doesn’t.
Sound selfish? Yea I would have thought that too.
Want to know a secret though?
I am a better friend, wife, mother, daughter, sister, driver, customer, patient….well you get the idea.
Why? I am not walking around arguing with myself!
Try it out-see if it works for you. Make a room all your own.